The Stool Pigeon music newspaper

We met for the interview in Chinatown in London, sat down for some food in a quiet backroom, poured sake and waited for the bento boxes. Divas like sushi.

“So, what’s your angle?”

“I’m not gonna make this too difficult.”

“Good.”

First, I tried to blow smoke rings up her ass by saying that her new album, The Blue God, hit me in the most pleasurable way: like a big wet fish… or more like the fishmonger’s wife, creeping up behind me and encircling me with her strong arms and a faint whiff…

“…of fish. Uncanny.”

I’m really proud to know this lady and certain this album is going to be huge. Miss Topley Bird has a face and a voice that can melt rock. She has her own way of speaking. She is a star. Her voice was the key to Tricky’s success on Maxinquaye. The Gorillaz greatly benefited too, and even I got her to sing for a steal. In fact, still haven’t paid her.

I wonder how she keeps her nerve. She’s always so damned confident. Why isn’t she freaking out about how this album will go over?

“I’ve realised that the only way to make myself happy is to make music that I like, and I get some kind of weird natural confidence that other people will like it because I do,” she says.

The record, she tells me, has been a long time coming, but was quick to make after she met Danger Mouse, who jumped at the chance to do it.

And what was the creative process like with Mr Mouse?

“Well, it was a threesome actually - me, Mr Josh Klinghoffer and Mr Mouse,” she explains. “And we ran the gamut - did the Karma Sutra of musical positions for creative collaboration. We came at it from all directions.”

The tunes are grown-up. They move key, use different time signatures, and have some brave sounds and playing on them. Never repetitive or dull. It will be a treat to hear live.

The look of the thing is like an old Kung Fu film and one tune is even called ‘Shangri La’.

“I’ve been getting into lots of Asian stuff, Korean film, for the last couple years,” she says. “Become sort of an Asiaophile.”

Again I try to find out if she’s nervous about the success or failure of her album. If I don’t get millions of people humping to my tunes and a Grammy or two, I feel like I’ve let everyone down.

“In that case… unless I’m crowned Empress of the Universe… But that kind of thinking would just drive me crazy.”

It’s good you have a much less fanatical and obsessive outlook.

“I’m really all about being happy.”

Finally, I ask if she has any words of advice for young people.

“Jeezuz, it’s really foolish to give advice to young people, but if you twisted my arm I’d say be self-sufficient.”

Martina left her phone in the restaurant. She left her wallet in a taxi. But things come back to her. The world loves her.

We ate and rushed off to see Heavy Trash at the 100 Club. Then onto Gaz’s Rockin’ Blues. I made sure the Empress got into a cab and went back in to dance with the fishmonger’s wife. Everyone asked who my friend was. She’s a star, of course.