Unsigned Noise
Words Jeremy Allen
Send your work of genius through the ears of The Stool Pigeon to the address on the contact page. Please mark the envelope ‘Demo’.
Everybody’s trying to make some green singing the blues.
Though from Middlesex, there’s something jingly, jangly about THE NEW SOUTHPAW SOVIET that calls to mind obscure Scottish indie pre-Britpop. Not necessarily a bad thing. If you’d just woken up from a coma having overdosed on The Smiths, then this would probably be the sort of jaunty fare you might want in your lugholes, though the soporific nature is at odds with the agenda handwritten within. “The NSPS believe the point is to change,” they state, which is clearly something they’ll get round to themselves eventually. Certainly not a chore and showing shoots of promise. The inclusion of strings and well-thought-out harmonies garnish catchy tunes, but nowhere near as threatening as their implication.
myspace.com/thenewsoutpawsoviet
Jah and Scouse, who make up Welsh collective TAFFIA, may be stoners. I only suggest this because they’ve put a sticker on the inlay written in Rizla font, and because they’re fond of singing in falsettos about buying things in supermarkets. “I saw you in the Lidl / I saw you in the Co-op / I saw you in the Morrison’s…” are some of the choice lyrics, soundtracked by grainy guitar and drum machine, like a low-rent, bedroom Pop Will Eat Itself. They actually sent a whole album, which is very kind, though to date we’ve not ventured far past track one. Supermarket Sweep presenter Dale Winton will be turning in his sunbed.
myspace.com/taffiamusic
Little is known about GLASSGLUE, which adds somewhat to the enigma of their peculiar number ‘Spiral Stair’, though on further investigation (by looking at their website) it appears as though the singer has a bit of an ‘Art Garfunkel’ going on, by which we mean a barnet that is less hairstyle, more wraparound pencil case. More pulchritudinous animal-attacking-the-ears hair would not go amiss in the current scene. This is certainly one of the more intriguing offerings in the Pigeon mailbag - spacious, slightly creepy, with the best use of the sound of a reversing coach ever committed to disc. The second track ‘If I Were The Sky Right Now’ is deliberately atonal - possibly too deliberate as it grates without any of the desirable side-effects.
myspace.com/glassglue
There’s nothing to dislike about THE FICTION, in the same way you could never hate your little brother’s band. On the plus side the singer sounds unnervingly like a young Robert Smith without trying, and the songs themselves are alright, though the execution is a little clumsy in places, and the sound on the whole thin, with too much space. If they concerned themselves less with trying to sound like Wire and relaxed into it more they might just be dangerous. Apparently they’re influenced lyrically by Jane Austen and Kafka, so I can’t wait to hear the one about the runty, plain cousin in rapture about her forthcoming conjugal felicity with the handsome Mr Darcy, only to wake up on her wedding day to find she’s turned into a beetle.
myspace.com/thefictionlondon
A word to the wise MILKWOOD: never put a dull track on your demo first when the second one is much better. Not that record companies listen to them anyway. After trawling through stuff about “being free from bodily function and insecurities”, track ‘Jenny’ is ebullient in comparison, with a lovely, lilting chorus that continues upward when you least expect it to. Recorded live presumably, with nice things like rainbrushes, glockenspiels and the charango about the place, there are some great things trapped within this shiny circular object they call a CD, though a little more work on the presentation, namely timing, wouldn’t go wanting.
myspace.com/milkwoodband
Oh, confound you HEMME FATALE, with your well-produced, sexy contemporary music. It’s all going so well until somebody opens their mouth. It’s a bad sign when you start off thinking Daft Punk and end up thinking Baxendale. A more visceral approach would be welcome, rather than too-clever-by-half student types sabotaging something that could be truly incredible. Get a vocoder or something and go easy on the lyrics is my advice. It’s not like anyone really listens to the words anyway.
myspace.com/hemmefatale
As Gordon Brown languishes in the polls the big incompetent duffer, less popular than Michael Foot and Ian Huntley molesting a baby, he could learn a thing or two about dynamism from BRITISH BROKEN CLASS: how to use dynamics properly. With ‘Scene’, they ease their way into your consciousness like a beautiful morning seeping through the curtain crack, then stealthily penetrate the functioning side of your brain, rendering you unable to move, or fall back to sleep even. It’s stark and unsettling, and the biggest compliment we can pay is that they know how to use the space, so you’re hearing even when you’re not hearing. If that makes sense.
myspace.com/britishbrokenclass
PATRICK PLUNKETT is a dude. We know this because he is wearing sunglasses on the cover. Unless he’s blind like near-namesake David Blunkett. His new EP is called ‘New Beginnings’ which makes us wonder if he’s already had a catastrophic history. Remember Bucks Fizz did a song called ‘New Beginnings’ in 1987 after a near fatal bus crash. They disappeared into the dumper thereafter, forced for eternity to tour the British holiday triumvirate ad nauseam (Butlin’s, Pontin’s and Centre Parcs). While Patrick’s music is not my thing, this is very well put together: the songs are good and he has a nice, tremulous voice. If only Fame Academy was still on.
myspace.com/patrickplunkett
LOQUI are the kind of experience you’d sooner check out live, probably at a drunken wedding. There’s more than a hint of the J Geils Band about them (who had a hit possibly before Loqui were born with ‘Angel Is The Centrefold’) and a touch of Van Morrison too. They’ve got a future as a professional touring band: the sort you’d feel no shame having a knees up with your mum to.
loqui.co.uk
ARCS OF RED ROCK! Boof! You’ll have to listen to their MySpace though as I’ve run out of words. See ya!
myspace.com/arcsofred
Our pick for the fat advance: British Broken Class.
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- Unsigned Noise (Posted in 014 December 2007 | Demos | The Stool Pigeon Review)
